Tuesday, December 04, 2007

musings on gay marriage

i've been thinking a lot about weddings lately. almost non-stop. it's terrifying to spend the bulk of your life as a tomboy and then suddenly find yourself enthralled with bridal magazines, wedding dress shopping and gift registries. very strange.

ash and i are getting married next summer. it seems like a long way off. i've observed that this is a coastal thing. if you're eight months out on the west coast, you've got forever. if you're eight months out on the east coast, you best get your ass in gear and start planning!

so, the more i've been thinking about the prospect of spending the rest of my life with someone i can't imagine spending my life without...the more i've been thinking about the segment of the population who are unable to marry. particularly in san francisco, where gay is part of the fabric of our city and pride is a city-wide celebration, it's hard to imagine that people spending their lives together are unable to call it marriage. there's a whole language to dance around the concept. partner. significant other. companion. domestic partner. roommate. bleh.

a couple of years ago, gavin newsom effectively legalized gay marriage within san francisco. couples from around the country came to sf's city hall to get married. the rest of the country had a fit. it's largely cited as the reason bush got elected to a second term.

without making any judgement about the sanctity of marriage from a religious perspective, it's hard to see why from a purely civic perspective, marriage for anyone who wants it wouldn't be an option. if straight people can get married in vegas on a whim and have it annulled once the booze wears off, how come gay people can't get married?

i'm looking toward this august, feeling amazingly lucky to have found my besheret. i hope that we get to a point where everyone can experience this feeling - regardless of whom they've decided to love for the rest of their lives.

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